It’s day three of the annual New Year for a New You series with me, Lisa Jacobs! Welcome back for your next dose of review and reflection. If this is your first year joining me, here’s how it works: I’ll offer you a new list of prompts and review questions every day through Monday, January 2.
Each day, I answer the same questions and post them as examples. You’ll find my thoughts from the previous day before the next set of prompts are issued. If you want to blog your answers as well, I’d love to read them. Please link up in the comments below or use #yby2017 on social.
At whatever place you start or pace you take, I’m honored you’re here.
Yesterday, we continued the series with a list of ten questions that helped us review what wasn’t working in 2016. The truth is, we sometimes get very comfortable with our obstacles, for one reason or another:
- We like the nurturing attention it brings from the outside world;
- We’re addicted to the dramatics an unsolved problem creates; or (most likely)
- We feel overwhelmed, uncertain and too scared to take the first step in the right direction.
In 2017, I vow to take steps in the right direction, no matter how overwhelmed, uncertain and scared I feel. Are you with me? GOOD! Here are my answers to yesterday’s prompts …
:: What was time wasted this year?
This question has stumped me more than any other in review. If I wasn’t busy building this year, I was busy changing, celebrating change, or recovering from change. It’s been a really full twelve months, and I get defensive when I try to come up with an answer because I tried so hard to spend my time wisely.
Going forward, I am going to delegate and automate in 2017 so that my precious hours are spent even more wisely.
:: What was money wasted this year?
I spent richly in 2016, and sometimes it backfired which is directly related to issues with deserving (<<< no one teaches this lesson better than Denise Duffield-Thomas).
Here are a few examples:
- I booked a luxury home in San Francisco for a family trip … only to find it completely filthy upon arrival.
- I found the house of my dreams in the most perfect location … only to have the loan on it threaten to fall apart twice.
- I showed up for vacation with my family to the Disney Cruise I booked as one of my income rewards … only to realize I didn’t pack the correct papers for my husband and I, and we almost missed the ship.
There is nothing coincidental about these near-miss disasters, I’m sure. My money isn’t being wasted, but rather, there’s something unhealthy about my current relationship with it. And that’s one thing I’ll be aiming to improve in the coming year.
:: What was the biggest challenge you faced this year?
My husband and I decided to move this year, and it was the biggest challenge – not so much the moving, but the decision to move. Asking our children to trust that their schools, social lives, friendships, location, and futures would all be better (as we hoped) – that was my biggest challenge, for sure.
:: If anything, what would you change about how you handled that challenge?
I wish I would’ve taken more time to strengthen my peace of mind. It all worked out so beautifully, and when I take risks in the future, I don’t want to allow them to take such a toll on my heart and spirit.
:: Are you ending the year with any unfinished business?
I’m still getting my financial books in order from 2016, and it looks as though that will be in the works through the first quarter of 2017. I’m eager for receipts and closure.
I’m also in need of new long-term goals because living without them leaves me feeling unfinished and aimless.
:: Are there any outstanding goals you’d like to let go of?
Not at this time, but for example’s sake – this is a great prompt to help you let go of goals you feel obligated to complete even though they’re not the greatest use of your time or energy.
In 2014, I answered …
“Gosh, yes. There’s a study program I’ve been involved in for years that I have yet to finish. I’ve probably mentioned it in every New Year for a New You on this blog. All of my income-producing projects take priority, and I’d like to get this out of the way or let go of it once and for all.”
It’s my favorite example of why it’s better to sometimes release a goal than continue to pursue it.
I had been involved in a study program for years, and I wanted the certificate that said I completed it – which would’ve required another hundred hours. But in my heart, I knew I’d learned everything I needed to know (both personally and professionally) from the program, and I was only prolonging this commitment because I felt I should get that final certificate.
Instead, I decided to invest my study hours in ways that would further my career. I don’t regret starting the study program, and my only regret about leaving it is that I wish I would’ve done it sooner!
:: What was your worst setback in 2016?
I have been struggling with diet and exercise for entirely too long. For the last two years, I’ve been killing myself in cardio and weight training, and then sabotaging my progress in reward binges.
When I moved in October, it forced me to reevaluate my approach. I didn’t have the time to work out, I was naturally active because of the move, and I made healthy food choices to keep my energy up.
For the first time in years, I lost weight.
I insisted on this hardcore approach (that clearly wasn’t working) for way too long! My new plan is to eat well, live well, and stay active. Here’s to new beginnings!
:: Which bad habits or unhealthy patterns did you engage in that you’d like to give up once and for all?
That money thing I mentioned above (and all those near-miss disasters)! I keep Denise Duffield-Thomas’ Get Rich, Lucky Bitch! on my iPad. After the first read, I made a commitment to myself to read it bi-annually. I’m overdue!
Also, in that answer above I mentioned my “hardcore approach.” I’m very strict on myself in just about every aspect of life, and I’m going to strive to be much more gentle and nurturing towards my own needs in 2017.
:: What or whom held you back this year? Did anything make you shrink into yourself or feel defensive about your dreams?
I started making really good money this year. When sharing the news, I paid very close attention to how I felt about the reveal. Was I excited to share, knowing they would be thrilled for me? Or, was I anxious and unsettled to share, knowing they would feel threatened or otherwise critical of my success? I encountered both, for sure.
I will go out of my way in 2017 to be a cheerleader for success – yours, mine and ours. I will actively refuse to spend time, energy or attention on anyone who does not embody the same goodwill.
:: How did you hold yourself back this year? Which beliefs | ideas | excuses stopped you from pushing forward?
I have more to uncover in the deserving department. I have plenty more to learn about managing stress and anxiety.
I’m going to share a few prompts to help you choose your intentions for the New Year. I like to do this exercise before setting any major goals or resolutions to get a sense of what I really want to create in the coming months. As Jack Canfield said,
You don’t want to get to the top of the ladder only to find out you had it leaning against the wrong wall.
What do you want from 2016? Consider the following five pillars of a harmonic life, as taught in Harmonic Wealth: The Secret of Attracting the Life You Want by James Arthur Ray:
Next, we’re going to apply each change/desire above to the following list. I’ve gathered the questions below from MONEY Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom by Tony Robbins:
- What do I really want? (vision)
- What is important about it? (values)
- How will I get it? (methods)
- What is preventing me from having it? (obstacles)
- How will I know I am successful? (measurements)
Thank you for joining me on Day 3 of this 7-day series! See you tomorrow with a new list of prompts + my example answers to today’s questions. It’s time to make your big dreams happen already. Here’s to your best year yet,